Impossible
by Through the Mirror Darkly
Summary: Elizabeth realizes who truly has her heart, and decides it's time to do something about it. (Liason)


**Summary:** Elizabeth realizes who truly has her heart, and decides it's time to do something about it. (Liason)

 **Inspiration:** Set around in 2001, when Jason left again to not get between Lucky and Elizabeth. To me it was clear that Jason loved Elizabeth and she loved him. Everyone else just couldn't handle it. Carly and Sonny couldn't handle Jason's devotion to Liz coming above them. The Spencers wanted Liz to fix Lucky, so they didn't have to. So this in my head is what would have happened if Elizabeth had realized that she didn't love Lucky, and realized the truth for what it was.

 **AN:** I don't remember much of the show around this time, I wasn't an avid watcher so if there is any mistakes in the timeline please just disregard and consider it mildly AU.

 **Inspiration:** "Impossible" by Nightcore

 **EDITED on 1/6/2016**

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 **IMPOSSIBLE**

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 _By ThroughtheMirrorDarkly_

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Elizabeth remembered years ago when someone told her to be cautious when it came to love. She couldn't remember if it was her mother, or her father. It really didn't matter, the sentiment stuck with her. And she had been cautious in love, except she had done it all wrong. As a child, she had fought for love from her parents, but was always found lacking in her sister's shadow. It bred insecurities, ones that Elizabeth had tried to shed by becoming Lizzie, the little hellion who was already for trouble. If she didn't meet her parents' expectation, then she would pretend not to care.

Then they sent Sarah to their grandmother, and left Elizabeth to particularly fend for herself. The abandonment hurt, cementing the fact that she didn't matter to them. Everything that followed, running to Port Charles and moving into her grandmother's house. She thought she had found a place to belong, because even when did bad things her grandmother still loved her.

Or had that been a lie, too?

Elizabeth wasn't sure, but what she was sure of was that she wished that night when she crawled out of those bushes broken and bleeding that she had picked herself up. She wished that Lucky had never came across her, and she wished she had been conned into believing that she "owed" him something. Even if she did owe him for helping her stand that night, hadn't she repaid that in tenfold? Helping Lucky through finding out about his mother's rape at his father's hands, which had turned Elizabeth's recovery into holding him up? Or walking away from a man that she truly loved in order to fix him, when his family couldn't be bothered to care?

That's right. Elizabeth loved Jason Morgan.

She had loved him since she had found him in the snow, and picked him up. She could remember the panic, and desperation she felt when she realized that he was hurt. Hiding him and healing him, protecting him from Carly, it had given her a purpose. It had given her a reason to move on from Lucky's "death", where her heart had been completely shattered.

She was glad that Lucky was alive. It was a miracle, but he was not the same boy he had been. Neither was she the same girl. They were no fifteen year olds holding an innocent love towards each other, and it was unfair to force them to be something they were not. They might have had a permanent lock, but she didn't have the same heart she did now. Jason didn't just fix her heart, he gave her a completely new one and one that solely, irrevocably belonged to him.

She just wished she had seen it sooner.

She wished she had seen it before he left. _He left again,_ Elizabeth closed her eyes in mute despair. The first time he left was to escape Sonny's betrayal with Carly, but this time, he had left because _her_. Her heart ached each day since he had left, and at first she had let herself believe that it was just guilt for hurting him. But as she sat in her studio, blocking out the world and everyone along with, she reevaluated her choices.

" _I don't want to be free. I want to be with Lucky."_

How could she be so stupid? How could she be so blind? Why had she let herself believe in the illusion that was Elizabeth and Lucky? All Elizabeth wanted was to be free to be who she was with those who didn't force her to be something other than that. How could she say that to Jason? Did he see into her eyes, and see that was far from the truth? If he left, he must not have. When Lucky had "died", it had been hard. One of the hardest things that Elizabeth had to go through, but she went through it. She grieved and mourned and became stronger. She had become her own person, not an attachment to Lucky which she realized is what people had treated her like through those years.

She hadn't cared, mistaken complacency with acceptance.

However now, she had a taste of independence and freedom. She didn't want to just be Lucky's girlfriend. She wanted to be Elizabeth. She wanted to be a person, not a gift along with purchase. As for Lucky, how was she supposed to deal with the fact that it was clear that he was stringing her along? The ring on her finger felt like the final nail in the coffin instead invoking any measure of happiness like it should have. Her stomach churned at the very sight of it. It took everything in her not to chuck it across the room, or flush it down the drain. It wasn't a symbol of love. It was no better than a dog collar, one that would grow tighter and tighter with each passing year. There was no true love in Lucky for her. She knew he cared, on some level she knew that.

But she deserved better.

So did Jason.

She dreamed of his blue eyes shining with love, like they had so many times. Elizabeth hadn't recognized the emotion for what it was because she had been unprepared for it. Ironic that she spent most of her life trying to earn love from everyone around, but here this man gave it to her so freely and she hadn't even recognized. She had recognized it in one moment, she had been hanging out with Emily at the Quartermaine's. She had snuck off to the rose gardens which she had loved so much when she caught Lila and Edward talking softly to one another.

Love shining in their eyes.

Love that Jason had in his eyes when he had looked at her.

The realization hit her with all the force of a truck. As she looked around her studio where her feelings for Jason blossomed, Elizabeth held her arms around her midsection and she drew in a shaky breath. Her eyes flickered to the painting, _the Wind,_ that sat on her couch and she looked over the beautiful colors. The colors that she only ever saw with Jason, and that meant something.

That meant something…

And Elizabeth was tired of pretending that it didn't.

With a deep breath, Elizabeth steeled herself and reached up to her hand. She pulled the ring off her fingers, and she felt a painful knot inside of her chest loosen. She brought the ring up to eye level and she stared at it, squaring her shoulders. "It's time that I start being true to myself," Elizabeth whispered, her voice quiet, but strong.

* * *

Elizabeth had arrived at Kelly's to met with Emily, Nicolas and Lucky. She wanted to pull Lucky aside to talk to him alone, but before she could get a word in edge wise the other three just started making plans and decisions for the wedding. It left Elizabeth with a sick, dizzy feeling and she felt could feel her free will slipping out of her hands. It this how the last year had been? Letting people talk over her, and steal her own voice?

"So when are you guys having the wedding?" Emily said, excitedly. Elizabeth stared at her for a long moment, and wondered why she never realized that Emily would be Lucky's friend first and foremost. She only supported Elizabeth when she was fixing Lucky, and it stung because Elizabeth had considered Emily her best friend. Another thing that had been a lie.

"Actually about that," Elizabeth turned her gaze towards the smiling Lucky. The Lucky who couldn't seem to make up his mind whether he truly loved her. At least, he had stopped the nonsense about her belonging with Nicolas. She couldn't tell how many times she had wanted to punch his lights out for toying with her like that, even if it hadn't been of his complete volition. "Can we go talk somewhere private," Elizabeth asked, whispering. She didn't want to break off the engagement in the middle of Kelly's. She wasn't that cruel.

Lucky frowned. "Anything you say to me, you can say to Emily and Nicolas," the blond stated, his eyes narrowed slightly. It was as if he could sense her hesitance.

"Lucky," Elizabeth hesitated, with a sigh.

"Come on, Liz," Nicolas stated, unconcerned. "We're all friends here."

"Friends or not, this is not the place do this," Elizabeth stated, a twinge of frustration in her voice. This is how they got her to choice the things they wanted, they would politely gang up on her until she gave in. How many times had she set aside her own opinions in favor of theirs? Her stomach twisted violently.

"To do what?" Emily said, her smile slipping. Her eyes darted all over Elizabeth, trying to determine what had brought this change in Elizabeth. Her friend's expression was determined and distant, and that's when Emily saw the ring missing off of Elizabeth's finger. "Are you breaking up with Lucky?" Emily nearly shouted.

Kelly's went quiet, and Elizabeth felt a flush curl up into her cheeks. She could feel the weight of everyone's stare and they strained to hear what she had to say. Elizabeth let out a deep breath, and steeled herself. "Yes, I am," she announced, keeping her face carefully blank. "This isn't the place, or how I wanted to tell you Lucky, but I am calling off our engagement."

"What the hell, Elizabeth?" Lucky asked. His face twisted with betrayal and he looked at her like he had never seen anything like her. "How could you do this?"

"Because I don't love you, Lucky," Elizabeth said, being brutally honest. "And if you search your heart, you'll see that you don't love me either."

"Of course, he loves you! He fought his way to be back with you, Elizabeth," Emily looked furious. "How can you be so selfish?"

"Selfish? I am the one who is selfish? So I should just pretend to love Lucky, and let himself believe it? How is that fair to him? How is that fair to me, Emily?" Elizabeth gave her a scathing glance, and squared her shoulders. "The only selfish people here are you, Nicolas, Luke and Laura. Instead of stepping up and helping Lucky along side of me, you place it all on my shoulders not even bothering to consider the fact that Lucky is not the boy who left and neither am I the girl he fell in love with. We've changed, Lucky," she turned back towards him, and her eyes pleaded with him to understand where she was coming from. "I never wanted to hurt you, Lucky, but that is all that we will do. We might be able to pull off the charade and make believe for a little while, but the truth will always come out."

"That's not true," Lucky denied, his voice strained.

"It is," Elizabeth was resolute. She held out her palm, the engagement ring sitting there and she looked at Lucky sadly. "Here."

"No, no," Lucky shook his head.

"Elizabeth, you're not thinking straight," Nicolas stood up, and came around the table. "You're just scared. It's understandable, but there is no reason to do something this drastic."

"Scared, Nicolas?" She shook him a look of disbelief. "I was scared when I thought Lucky was dying in a burning building. I was scared when I found Jason bleeding on the ground. I was scared when I drank poison. This is not fear that is compelling me now. I need to be true to myself, something I haven't been since Lucky came back from the dead."

"So you wish I never came back?" Lucky snapped.

"No," Elizabeth said, shocked that he would even suggest such a thing. "No! I am happy that you are alive, Lucky. I'm happy that Luke and Laura got this amazing miracle, and I got my friend back. But that's all I feel for you…friendship. I am sorry that I let things get this far, and I am sorry that I pulling the rug out from underneath you. I never wanted to that, but I can't pretend to love you…when my heart belongs to someone else."

Lucky stared at her hard. "Jason," he spat the name. "You're in love with Jason? You love that thug?"

"Don't ever call him that," Elizabeth said, her expression cooling. "But if you must know…yes, I love Jason. I have loved him ever since that winter he stayed in my studio. He healed me, and helped me become stronger. He made me feel again, and made me feel alive."

"And I don't make you feel that way?" Lucky demanded. "Huh? How do I make you feel Elizabeth? How does being with me make you feel?"

"Lucky, don't," Elizabeth shook her head.

"Answer me, Elizabeth!" Lucky shouted.

"DEAD!"

The word echoed throughout Kelly's diner, and Lucky took a step back from her. He looked speechless, a wounded gleam in his eyes as he held his breath. Emily's mouth was dropped open, while Nicolas looked at Elizabeth as if he saw her for the first time in forever.

Elizabeth swallowed thickly. "Being with you makes me want to die," she told him, her voice hoarse and unshed tears in her eyes. "Being with you makes me chips away at my soul because I know that what is between us is not love. It's toxic, and it will condemn us to a life of misery. I don't want to live like that," she said, a tear sliding down her cheek. "Neither should you."

Elizabeth stepped forward, and placed the ring on the table. She looked one last time at Lucky, and wished there was some way to make this better. But it wasn't her place to do that. "I'm sorry, Lucky," she told him, and walked towards the door.

"You little bitch," Emily snarled, and tried to go after her.

Nicolas held her back.

"Nicolas, what are you doing?" Emily demanded.

"Enough, Emily," Nicolas shook his head. "Just…enough."

Elizabeth stepped out of Kelly's with one destination on her mind. To go to Sonny's and bribe him with brownies to get him to tell her where Jason was and if Carly tried to get in her way…well, God have mercy on the blond because Elizabeth wouldn't.

* * *

Jason had just gotten back to his apartment with an arm full of groceries, and he opened the door, careful to lock it behind him. He started across the living room when he became aware of a shadow off to his right. He quickly dropped the groceries onto the couch, and reached for his gun when a very familiar voice made him freeze.

"I have been such an idiot. Can you forgive me?"

"Elizabeth," Jason breathed out, shocked. He turned around and found her standing there in the apartment, with her arms wrapped around her midsection. She looked beautiful, just like she always did.

"Jason," her lips quivered into a hesitant smile.

Jason felt so many emotions well up inside of his chest. Emotions that only Elizabeth managed invoke inside of him, and he took a step forward only to halt half afraid that this was some kind of dream. That she would disappear the second he touched her. As if reading his thoughts, Elizabeth slowly moved forward until she was within arms reach. Her fingers slid into his while her eyes never for one second left his. "What are you doing here?" He breathed out, the feeling of her skin upon his made his heart jolt inside of his chest.

"I'm here for you," she said, her blue eyes lighting up in that way they always did with him. "I have realized that lately I haven't been true to myself. I've stopped fighting for the things that I really want, too afraid of being abandoned by those around me. It did hit me until you left that the person I was afraid of being left by was you."

Jason swallowed thickly. "What are you saying, Elizabeth?" He needed to hear her say it. He needed to hear the words come from her mouth.

"I'm saying that I've never been more happy than when I'm with you. I'm saying that you've had my heart since that winter I found you in that snow, I've just been too afraid to admit it," Elizabeth said, her voice soft and earnest. She held nothing back, letting all she felt for him shine in her eyes and she felt him take a sharp breath. "I'm saying that I don't want Lucky."

She slid her hands up his arms as his hands slid around her waist. "I want to be free…with you," she whispered out. "I want to stay on the road to nowhere and I never want to stop. I want to be with you, because I love you and I can't imagine my life without you. Do…you still feel the same?" Elizabeth asked, softly.

"Always," Jason told her, pulling her close. His hand cupping her cheek, and brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. "I will always love you."

A smile broke across Elizabeth's face and Jason dipped his hand, pressing his lips to hers. It was a slow tender kiss, expressing all that he felt for her in that kiss. Elizabeth melted into his arms, and for the first time in her life…

She belonged.

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 **END OF STORY!**

 **Hope you all enjoyed! :D**

 **Rrs are appreciated.**


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